video | @typhoon

[photosympathies]

I need advice!

( Hello network, here's your friendly neighbourhood Stampede about to fully launch into something with no forewarning and no introductions. It's how he makes friends ... and also enemies, don't worry. ) So, we have to get jobs, right? But I'm not exactly sure what I'd be good at. I usually just do whatever people need around the towns I'm visiting, which means I know a little of most things. But I figured this place was new and people might be a little more cautious about that. So I made flyers!

( In one hand - metal, blue sometimes sea green - Vash holds up a stack of leaflets. )

Only when I was trying to give them out I got a lot of dirty looks so can someone tell me what I've done wrong! I really want to be useful while I'm here.

( Turning the flyer around so that his ( unfortunate ) captive audience can see. The design is obviously home made, and probably in a rush. On the paper it proudly proclaims

VASH THE STAMPEDE
RENT BOY
WILL DO WHATEVER YOU NEED
COST: ???
Below that is a crude drawing of the man himself - a stick figure with a triangle body ( his coat, sadly missing ) and a mass of spiky hair. It has a crude beaming smile on the circle of a face. )

Is it the drawing? I could have done better I guess, but I was in a hurry. ( A pause, a slow dawning realisation. ) Aw, shoot. It's the name, right? I didn't use my civilian name! Crap, that's probably a no-no.

( Nothing else could be the issue.

... Right? )

Comments

@destiny

[intertwinedfates]

Uh. I'm guessing the name's not so much the issue as is the advertisement itself. Take it from me, wording is everything when it comes to self-promotion.

It has to be more snappy! Like... "Guy for hire: whatever you need, with speed!" And what YOU need is a top-notch artist to give your ad a visual pop that'll catch people's attention!

And it just so happens I work for cheap as an artist, if you're interested!

[photosympathies]

Oh! Hey, you're right, that does sound better. More professional!

( No wonder he got chased out of that combini! He just wasn't very sharp on the get-go. The offer of help brightens him up but then he wilts just as quickly, rubbing the back of his neck and letting out a quietly embarassed heh. )

And I really would, I'm not very good at art. But I kinda already used the money they gave me on these leaflets. And then I maaaaybe spent the rest on donuts. ( Bad business practices all round! ) ... You don't need any odd jobs doing, right?

[intertwinedfates]

You see? And it's more memorable, so you'll stick in people's minds longer!

[If he could reach through the screen and pat the guy, he would. Seems like he needs some moral support rather than being scolded for his attempts at drumming up business. Because boy how does Yato know what that's like.]

Donuts, huh? I can't blame you. The food we get isn't exactly the most thrilling. You gotta treat yourself to something familiar and nice when dealing with this crazy world-hopping shit! Though I get the feeling we're in the same line of work, really.

...hey, instead of trading jobs or fees, maybe we could team up or something? Two guys can handle twice the workload, right?

@meatbuns

[saragi]

isn't a rent boy a prostitute?

no wonder they were giving you filthy looks, man

[photosympathies]

( ...

Oh no.

Oh no.

Ohnononono. )

WHAT.

@pochita

[nutkick]

[ seconding alma ......... against his will. ]

you're calling yourself a prostitute.
as a cop, i should arrest you.

[photosympathies]

( He's been here five minutes and he's already in trouble with the law??? New record! )

woah, hey there sheriff.
it's not what it looks like!!!

@vessel

[eyescar]

Maybe it's because you didn't list a price?

[ Yuji frowns, thoughtful. ]

People like having a good idea of how much things are, I think.

[photosympathies]

See, I thought about that! But then I didn't want to set a price that people couldn't afford. Where I'm from people don't really have the spare double-dollars so mostly they barter, I didn't want to put people off.

( He was thinking ahead! )

@nice toy

[fursuit]

hahahaha

[ that's all he gets at first. sorry vash. but in his defense, this is funny? ]

well, not gonna lie, the drawing probably isn't helping. but that's not "dirty looks" level bad. that's cuz it sounds like you're you're hooking. course they might just be confused because you're trying to do it via flyer. that's a weird approach for that kind of work, I assume

what is that un what does it mean omg

[photosympathies]

( He's been read the riot act by now, which means this message comes from where he's laid face down on the floor like some poor abandoned sack. Next time he's going to start from text at the very beginning so nobody can see how much of a loser he is. )

i didn't know!!!
a guy told me that's what it meant once.
and i mean maybe it's what it meant there but now i'm not so sure.
he wasn't wearing very much ...

un: twin

[grade4]

[ yeesh. hm. video flicks on and a girl with a severe face and burn scars shows up. ]

How tough are you?

[photosympathies]

( Oh! She gets a little wave for her troubles, though Vash is completely unperturbed by the scars. )

Pretty tough! I'm a lot stronger than I look. Why? You need something moved or someone tussled with? I'm a strict peace lover but I can be real threatening when I want to be. Especially if someone's not minding their own business.

( As threatening as a guy who usually looks like this - (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ - can be )

@hellonurse

[wwtd]

[ boy, THIS TAKES HER BACK to her teenager days ]

The drawing isn't the problem. [ not the biggest one, anyway.] Or the name, I think. Most people might think it's a scam or a joke when they read something like this, um. Instead of "Rent Boy" [ she's avoiding eye contact with the network as she says this........ ] You could use something like "Professional Jack of All Trades" and list things you're particularly comfortable helping with or are good at.

... A flat rate cost would help too. Not question marks. "Open to discussion" works just as well.

[photosympathies]

( Oh, those youthful good looks, fooling everyone into believing a man of 150 shouldn't know any better! )

Oh! Yeah, you're probably right. Everyone's been explaining where I went wrong and I totally get it now. Don't listen to people in shady alleys when they try explaining things to you! But uh, the flat rate's the problem. I don't know what to charge, I don't want to make it too high that people can't ask for my help, you know? Money's scarce.

( Or it is in Gunsmoke. Neo Tokyo's far fancier than Vash has ever seen - even brighter than Julai even. ) But open to discussion seems a fair thing to put. The next flyer will definitely be better.

@KENSUKE, TEXT.

[vorous]

_{[ The problematic name goes over Laios' head. Instead, he's focused on that crude artwork, and in his true fashion, he's going to "actually" at Vash with his own art. ]}

It's probably because the art isn't eye-catching, but I drew something up for you!

_{[ and he sends an image of his art. Did he somehow make this worse? ]}

Sorry, I can't draw people, but I can draw animals and other creatures!

[photosympathies]

HOLD ON
HOLD ON
YOU DREW THAT???
I'M A DOG????

THAT'S SO FREAKING COOL!!!

( He is having a Moment, Laois. )

@ice snap

[bowtography]

[ wow, that picture.

But March will respond with a chipper little wave. ]

Instead of... um, artwork, what about a photo? Then they'd see for themselves that you're a good, trustworthy person! Probably.

[photosympathies]

You know what, I never thought about that. Where I'm from if someone's handing out pictures of your face then it's never a good sign. It usually means your bounty's gone up. And nobody thinks that's trustworthy!

Which isn't even fair, I'm a good guy.

@rasgulla

[peoplewatch]

[ That drawing is ... not good but he won't say it. ]

Would it help to list your skills on the placard too?

[photosympathies]

Kabru!

( Immediate delight, like a puppy hearing the front door open. )

And I guess you're right. I'm so used to people just deciding what they need help with but there's so many of us here I bet they don't want to impose. I just ... have to decide which ones to include.

( text ) un: shiro

[cranekin]

Maybe you can give examples of what you'll do.

[photosympathies]

... I didn't think there'd be enough paper. I'm really not picky.

@Coinflip

[failedsafe]

Well, obviously you're getting terrible reception! You left out the SSC!

[Lessa, no.]

[photosympathies]

I did? Oh no!

( A long pause, and then. )

What's the ssc?