is it a toktik or is it a business ad? @chocobo

[mesospheric]

[ It begins with… a blink. Some guy with gravity-defying blond hair looks around, as if surveying the area for passer-by before he engages in what must surely be an embarrassing affair, like the filming of a TokTik. ]

This isn’t necessary, but—

Do you… need things done?

[ He sort of starts off strong before trailing off in classic Embarrassed Delinquent-esque reluctance. His eyes, locked ahead. His expression, stony. ]

For a fee, certain troublesome tasks can be done for you to satisfying completion. This includes but is not limited to: monster slaying, bodyguard duty, and… errands.

The fee will fluctuate depending on what a hassle I find it to be.

[ Another blink. Another look around. Something surely comes next, right? Damn. Is Cloud his own PR department? ]

… I look forward to working with you.

[ And just like that, the feed ends. ]

MERC WORK
contact Cloud Strife for more info

Comments

[mace_pray_love]

[It only cost her the price of a few festival games, but she realizes she probably shouldn't say that on Cloud's advertisement where he's trying to earn actual money.]

that's basically asking me how much of a hassle i am. really wanna keep asking?

cloud's really reliable, that's the important thing to know. if you hire him, he won't let you down.

[shadowban]

isn't that actually good for promotion? if he can handle someone who's such a hassle then he can definitely handle reasonable clients. most people think they're reasonable.

you were really bad at games?

[mace_pray_love]

i'm not a hassle at all! i'm a delight to work with!!

i'm not bad at games, i just didn't want to waste a bunch of money trying to get the prize i wanted if he could do it faster. i was being responsible!

[shadowban]

you're the one who brought it up. just answer the question, then.

also that just sounds like you were cheating.

[ says megumi, who can beat even itadori yuji in arcade games and doesn't lose at crane games. oops. ]

Private

[mace_pray_love]

i just paid for the games he played to win us both prizes. and it wasn’t cheating because i needed the prize for the shrine, not for myself.

i was trying to keep it under wraps because cloud is too nice. if the other outsiders find out how easy he is to push around, he’s never going to get any paying work.

so if you’re hiring him to stalk your dad or whatever, you’ve gotta give him some money for it!

private onwards;

[shadowban]

i was going to pay him fairly, you don't have to threaten me about it. i'm asking him to do something dangerous for my sake. that deserves proper compensation.

...his name truly is cloud?

[mace_pray_love]

that wasn't a threat. it was me telling you what to do.

yes, i think so. why? it's a pretty name.

[shadowban]

it is, i just thought it was a codename or alias.

[ megumi you can't say shit your name is megumi. ]

don't tell me what to do. i was going to do it anyway.

[mace_pray_love]

I guess it could be short for something. 'cloudward'? 'cloudthew'? 'cloudbert'? nah, none of those sound right.

and if we're both in agreement about paying him, why's it matter if i said so?

[shadowban]

i don't like it when people tell me what to do. it makes me not want to do it.

cloudus? cloudine? maybe he's named something a little more arcane.

[mace_pray_love]

ok then, how about this. you better not pay cloud anything, and that's an order!!

i've got it- 'cloudulfus'.

[shadowban]

don't tell me what to do, i'll pay him whatever i want.

[ see, this is working! ]

clauderon.

[mace_pray_love]

DON'T THINK I DIDN'T SEE YOU TRYING TO WHEEDLE OUT A DISCOUNT JUST NOW!

i think we've been approaching this the wrong way. maybe it's 'stormcloud'.

[shadowban]

it wasn't wheedling, it was threatening.

[ don't make him explain himself, the logic is twisting and turning. ]

...he does seem to have a cold, stormy outlook. like a rain cloud.

[mace_pray_love]

sounds like we solved it!

so how's this- pay storm cloud fairly, or else you're gonna have to deal with me, and that's a threat.

[And if it hasn't been established, she can be A Hassle when she wants to be. She's decided Cloud is simultaneously really cool and also needs a protector from bullies. Sorry, Stormcloudbert.]

[mesospheric]

You know you can just ask me, right?

[shadowban]

it's a service review. if i just asked you it would a little biased.

[mesospheric]

... Yeah, that's probably true. Objective lines of questioning are hard to get. Good job.

[shadowban]

thank you...?

[ why is he feeling some kind of warmth in his heart? ]

has anyone else hired you?

[mesospheric]

A few. I get a few hits out in the city now and again for more errand oriented jobs.

[ So many vegetables picked. So many boxes hauled. ]

[shadowban]

—ah, really? we're allowed to take jobs out in the city? i didn't know that.

are there many jobs there?

[mesospheric]

If we aren't, I haven't been struck down by the powers that be, yet. I've been doing it since I landed here, but I use the civilian name LILITH gave me for extra security.

There's a lot in the shopping districts if you know where to look, but they tend to be one-off deals. Heavy lifting, help with construction, deliveries, etc. Plenty in the retail sector, I've noticed. Food service always seems to need the hands.

[shadowban]

ah, the civilian names. i haven't tested how well the aliases hold up to scrutiny. no better time than now to try, right?

[ hospitality and food service: apparently a universal thing across worlds. ]

these jobs are all above-board? what if your skills aren't suited for talking to other people?

[mesospheric]

[ Now… yeah, now he can see it. This kid is a terror. He must never be set loose on the populace. ]

Kitchen jobs. Back room sort of deals. The ads I’ve seen have been suggesting working with animals, or data work.

[shadowban]

[ he's going to make himself everyone else's problem until his actual father decides to parent up. ]

back room as in murder? assassinations? kidnappings?