synnet | video; @tsunpo

[ It starts like a 21st century video on a 21st century video app, with a guy in a funky get-up backing away from what can only be a camera lens. How? Why? Don’t worry about it. Worry instead about what’s going on: the guy, taking a seat on a plastic crate and pulling up a funky stringed instrument, one which he strums in one grand and dissonant swipe.

Got your attention? Good. That sounded terrible. He knows it did; it’s in the curl of his lip, and in the tip of his head like he’s looking at you, dear audience, challenge in every angle of his maddening face. Who wears sunglasses at night? This guy.

Pay mind, now. He’s begun to play. It isn’t a crazy crash of notes this time, though. This time, it’s harmonious when he launches into a song, plectrum a blur over silvery strings.

Well, what the hell.

When he’s done, without any warning, he points at the camera, at you, dear audience. ]

Are you tired of AI-generated media cluttering your feeds? Do you long for the spirit of music to grip your empty, human hearts once again? Do you wish to create something soulful for humanity to cling to before the next kaiju attack ruins your seasonal plans?

[ Another strum, a little threateningly. Twannng. ]

The time to create is now. Rise to the top as Neo-Tokyo’s new idol sensation. Start a band that the people will revere for the remainder of humanity’s tenure on this planet.

Allow me to help you.